"You can lose the battle, and still win the war."
And... if you have been following along with our tales, this adage might give you a clue as to what this post is about.
Yes, our dear Moonie. "Moonie-Junie" - he would tell you that I call him that when I want to talk to him. It's something just between him and me.
We have noticed of late that his eye was not looking any better during the first chemotherapy phase of his treatment (following two prior surgeries). At first I thought his eye might just be angry from all of the trauma, but each day it gets redder and lumpier. Each day it looks more like the tumor may be winning the battle.
Dr. Becky came to examine his eye yesterday, and, indeed, the tumor continues to grow.
Moonie is not his usual carefree self these days. He turns his back on me whenever I approach... a good indication that he'd prefer to be left alone. If you know Moonie, then you would agree that this in-your-face, friendly fellow is not himself. Normally, I cannot enter his yard without him coming over to see what I might want.
I can only surmise that his eye must be terribly uncomfortable.
And so, it has been decided that his eye must come out. It's a big step, but the only way we have of preventing this tumor from spreading into his bones. I am praying that it has not already done so.
So, yes, we have lost this battle, but we will stand beside our Moonie and do whatever we can to win the war.
As for one-eyed horses...
They adapt. There have been horses who have lost an eye and still gone on to participate in jumping and eventing. I have no doubt that our Moonie will clear this hurdle in his life and go back to enjoying normal life with his herd. His eyelids will be sewn together and over time will heal that way. At the end of all of this, he will simply have one eye that remains shut and is a little bit concave. Otherwise, he will still be our strikingly handsome fellow.
Personally, I can rationalize through all of this, knowing that losing an eye is for the greater good. However, I feel some sadness knowing that Moonie has more surgery ahead of him. I hope that I do not seem melodramatic... but I love my animals. They are family to me. They count on me to always do what is best for them. Failures are tough to swallow.