To: Kelloggs of Battle Creek
Marketing Department
Re: Advertised Position...Cover Model
Resume
Milford Redstar
The Barn, Bee Haven Acres, Central PA
Experience:
The Brooder House, Bee Haven Acres, April 2013 to June 2013
- responsibilities included learning to fend for self
- growth and maturation
The Frat House, Bee Haven Acres, June 2013 to July 2013
- held position of low man on totem pole
- learned to dodge and weave, developed running skills
- voice trained under Mr. Statler and Mr. Waldorf
The Horse Barn, Bee Haven Acres, July 2013 to present
- head rooster
- timekeeper, crowing at sun-up and sun-down
- chief turkey herder
- ladies man
- coordinator of feline activities
Education:
Coop of Hard Pecks,
Pledged the Cocka- Doodle- Doo Fraternity, but was black-balled during rush week
Expertise:
- Vocal proficiency
- Well versed in the subtle nuances of pecking orders
- Excellent sense of direction
- Top notch managerial skills
- Great people skills
- Able to juggle multiple tasks, with well-honed time management skills
Dear Kelloggs of Battle Creek:
Please consider Milford for the next cover model on the Kelloggs Corn Flakes Box.
This confident young rooster is quite photogenic and will work for chicken scratch!
For references, please contact this blog.
Sincerely,
Bee Haven Acres
PS:
I am still up to my eyeballs in concord grapes... and from just one vine that I had
left over and stuck in the corner of the garden!
In four years time that grapevine has covered half of two sides of the garden fence.
I borrowed a steamer/juice extractor from a friend and used it to make grape juice concentrate.
After two sessions, yesterday,
(and there are still more grapes to harvest)
I had canned enough concentrate to make 9 gallons of grape juice.
Can you believe it's Friday again?
This weekend is a quiet weekend at home for us.
The weather has become quite fall-like...
so it should be a terrific weekend.
We have special guests coming to the farm on Sunday...
will tell you all about that on Monday.
Have a great weekend...
Oh, and if you might want to serve as a character reference
for dear Milford...please let me know.
(And oh, what a character he is!)
left over and stuck in the corner of the garden!
In four years time that grapevine has covered half of two sides of the garden fence.
I borrowed a steamer/juice extractor from a friend and used it to make grape juice concentrate.
After two sessions, yesterday,
(and there are still more grapes to harvest)
I had canned enough concentrate to make 9 gallons of grape juice.
Can you believe it's Friday again?
This weekend is a quiet weekend at home for us.
The weather has become quite fall-like...
so it should be a terrific weekend.
We have special guests coming to the farm on Sunday...
will tell you all about that on Monday.
Have a great weekend...
Oh, and if you might want to serve as a character reference
for dear Milford...please let me know.
(And oh, what a character he is!)
Comments
Cynthia in Denver
It has been raining cats and dogs here with "loud" thunder and lighting. I've got my fingers crossed it clears for the weekend so I can get out in the garden. Lots of tomatoes to cann if the rain doesn't destroy them all!
GO MILFORD!!!!
Annie v.
Have a fun weekend...
I love my steam juicer and doing grapes and dark plums this year was wonderful. We freeze the juice for drinking in the winter and the pulp became jam. One of the things I've done this year is set my big metal pitcher in a bowl and surrounded it with ice. Sometimes I've noticed my juice will taste too cooked and this helps with this problem. I can hardly wait for apple season!
After working as a vocational counselor for many years, I have to comment that Milford's resume is better than 99% of the human clients' resumes that I reviewed. Milford is overqulified for many of the positions avaiable in today's less than stellar job market. I recommend he maintain his current employment at Bee Haven Acres, unless Kelloggs offers him a lifetime contract with benefits (Milfords' call) comensorate with his roostery lifestyle.