Conquering Fears

Yesterday afternoon was beautiful....clear blue skies, low 60's, cool breeze....perfect for a ride. I decided early in the day that I would make riding Moonbeam my goal for the day. This might seem like no big deal to many of you. But to me....huge goal. I have been avoiding getting back on Moonbeam since the last time I was tossed. About a year ago, I was riding him, when my friend's carriage and horse suddenly appeared out of the woods. Moonbeam freaked out and started to buck. I rode the buck for what seemed like an eternity...but eventually ended up on the ground. No big deal, no breaks, just a few bruises....but on top of the fractured pelvis and ribs that I had suffered the prior year (different horse)....it was enough to scare the heck out of me.

And so for the past year, I have done everything I could to avoid getting back up on the horse. I am great at coming up with all types of excuses....usually because there was some work that needed to get done....all the while just avoiding the idea (and never really fooling myself).

For the past couple of weeks, I have been working on ground driving Moonbeam to get my confidence back and to work on his "brakes". Because he is basically a driving horse, I have traded in the snaffle bit for a little harsher driving bit (still a kind bit, but more control). This has made a world of difference and has boosted my confidence.
So, today, with Hubbs in tow, I walked Moonbeam up to our arena and climbed back in the saddle. We did a few circles and worked on stops and starts, dismounted, remounted, repeated the circles and quit. That was enough for the first day. We ended on a positive note and my self confidence was boosted enormously. I still am not ready for a solo ride and will drag Hubbs with me until I am comfortable. But these baby steps are enormous gains for me.
It is all about conquering fears.....and another item on my "bucket list". I am not about to leave this world with an unchecked fear haunting me. Besides that, my horse needs to work. Hopefully, together we can gain confidence in each other. Hopefully, today is the beginning of a new chapter in our relationship.

Comments

Julie said…
Congratulations, Bev! Maybe this will encourage the rest of us to conquer our own fears. Thanks!
Anke said…
Good for you, getting back in the saddle and conquering your fears. It's not always easy, but seems like you did great.
Bee Haven Bev said…
Thank you, but believe me, I have a loooooonng way to go!
Anonymous said…
Good on you! First step is always the scariest, so you are well on your way now! He is a gorgeous horse too!
JudiB said…
Way to go Bev. I can totally relate. Years ago I had a bad fall and it still is in my mind like yesterday. Unlike you nothing broken so you have a lot more to overcome. Stay in the riding area as long as you need. With the deer around ect maybe that is the safest place to ride for awhile. Baby steps..good for you..thumbs up to ya!!
Judi B.
JudiB said…
Hope I have not posted twice..not sure who is at fault the computer or this old gal..lol. Wrote a comment then it disappeared..grrr!!
In any case Bev..way to go..good for you. Stay in the riding area for awhile. With the deer on the move maybe that is the place to be for awhile never mind horse visitors. With the injuries you had no wonder you have needed time.
Loved the wagon in your last post. The yard and house look great..what a lot of work and all worth it. Bet your loving every minute of your new home.

Judi B.
Anonymous said…
congratulations (I think)..I worry about serious injury..keep your cell phone with you when Hubs isn't around (get one with reception) you make a handsome couple (you and moonbeam)
To be a child again...to not even think of the consequences of our actions....wouldn't that be just grand!! No Fear!

Seems that age and pain from the falls can lead us into fear.

Just keep telling yourself that "the spirit of fear is not from God". This affirmation should help you each time you go to Moonbeam.

Oh...and thanks a bunch for stopping by to visit me!

Have a great day,
Hugs to you,
Steph
Cotton Blossom said…
Awsome! You should be so proud of yourself! May I also say I love your blog. I am such fan of your farm animals. Moonbeam is georgeous and all the tails are so cute! Thanks for the great read and all the chuckles so far. Look forward to much more.
Jessica said…
Good for you!! I've had my share of large animal mishaps and it is tough to "get back in the saddle" and get over the fears. Moonbeam sure is a handsome fellow!
Oh Bev, I am so proud of! You are so awesome! I didn't know about you falling before. Ouch! You have come a long way baby!!! Moonbeam and you make a beautiful pair!

Hugs,
Maryjane
Autumn said…
Check that one off your list,girl!!! You did it!!!!!
That's no baby step...gettin on that big ole horse without brakes!!!!
Aussiemade said…
Bev,not an easy thing to move on from so congratulations.
Ruth said…
Wow~good for you, Bev. It is a scary thing to get tossed and bucked. Glad to hear that you are making your way through this challenge.

Ruth